We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
