I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
