you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
