Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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