i think my tv is drunk
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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