haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
