i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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