is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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