Well apparently he's into motor boating.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
