So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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