Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
