wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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