he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
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