I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
