You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize