are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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