it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
