TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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