i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
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