She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
