sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
