Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
