So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
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