Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize