marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
