Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
