Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
