it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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