I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize