Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
