I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize