i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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