About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize