You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
