Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
