My brain says no but my pants say off.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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