I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
