He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
nutella sex= disaster
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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