What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize