i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
