Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize