i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
