so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize