I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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