i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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