so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize