a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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