Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He passed out mid-signature
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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