No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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