I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
You left your phone here
Wait...
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