i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize